Complicated Compliments CONUNDRUM~
You Could Have Heard A Pin Drop
As a Guidance Counsellor who loved being with the students not so much the administrative tasks, as you may deduce from the sign above I posted on my office door, my awesome team mate ‘supervisor’ Jean, smiled at me trustingly and obligingly said: ‘Great, you work with the students and develop the Grade 9 program for the school.’
That left me speechless since both she and I knew I was great at process work in the moment; not great at writing down the ‘how’ of anything I did. Jean however was and is a very loving and wise woman: she asked another counsellor, my friend to sit at the back of the room and write down what she observed as I interacted with the students. Then together as a staff we co-created a wonderful program for the grade 9’s in that school.
This particular day, we were discussing self esteem, ‘full steam ahead’ ability.
Listening to my intuition, I said to the class: “Let’s try something new. I need 3 volunteers and I am going to say something positive, negative or neutral to you. The only thing is that you will not know which one it will be. I need you to respond to me in role play.”
A young girl put up her hand. In a loud condescending tone I scolded: “You haven’t cleaned up your room or done your home work! No you are not going out!”Immediately the student began to berate me, call me names and fall predictably into the angry teenager role. I then stopped, thanked her and asked the class if they had ever seen this happen. All heads nodded in unison.
I asked for the next volunteer. Another young girl put up her hand and I spoke: “Its great weather we have today.” She agreed.
As I asked for the third volunteer, of course the whole class already knew what scenario was left. A young boy bravely stood up. I looked at him and in a warm caring voice said, “Do you ever have a nice smile”.
Silence. Profound nothingness. You could have heard a pin drop. Thirty two students ~ not a sound.
I looked around the room and said to the class, “What’s happening?”
After what seemed like a long time, someone said: “He doesn’t know what to say. We don’t hear nice things like that.”
Three more times, 3 more classes, grade 9 through grade eleven; same results consistently. It was then, with a lump in my throat, that my soul knew the depth of this teaching and the dire need to offer this tool to others. I am saddened once again, just remembering the heart felt depth of this moment and the deep trust those students had in me to be able to ‘stay with me in this process….
From my journalling I wrote back then:
this is the work of my soul and I know it so is so simple but so vital to wellness…help me god to bring this to the world in your way…show me, guide me…..thank you for bringing into my life the support for me in this work, my dear friends, my soul friend co-workers and family members who support me in this manner……As always, I am hearing Truth is so simple. Linda, go back to the simple.
In that moment I saw laid bare, the pain of the unacknowledged soul. The tender hearts of our pain filled children: the same pain that had drowned my soul as a very young child and most likely the souls of my own children at times, before I became aware. It is one of those moments when the precious gift of being a ‘teacher’ touched me to the core.
On the surface, how simple a compliment seems. Just an ordinary phrase. No big deal.
Not so~ A compliment is an open hearted act of kindness. Seemingly small, a compliment has the love force of touching another and reverberating to the essence of who we are. Validating, healing, energizing…
So what was my lesson, the nugget of gold from this profound awareness? I began to see clearly how easily many are conditioned to respond quickly in defensive anger, negativity, meanness and also how many are unable to receive the positive or the ‘good’.
How long will we choose to resist the simple truth of caring and kindness?
How can we begin to change this together?
What simple compliment, act of kindness may you offer or accept today, toward becoming the change in this world we all share?
To Risk~
The First Step Is The Most Challenging~
And The One That Brings New Life~
To Risk~
To laugh is to risk appearing the fool
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental
To reach for another is to risk involvement
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self
To place our ideas our dreams before the crowd
Is to risk their loss
To love is to risk not being loved in return
To live is to risk dying
To try is to risk failure
But risk must be taken
Because the greatest hazard in life
Is to risk nothing, do nothing, and be nothing
One may avoid suffering and sorrow
But one simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love or live
Chained by certitude, one is a slave
Has forfeited freedom
Only a person who risks is free
Anonymous
Universal Invite To Step Out Of The Box:
The New Moon In Cancer Eclipse:
Time To Make Time For The New~
If you have been feeling challenged, cranky, exhausted lately, and perhaps now feeling somewhat like my furry Angel friend here:
MODELLING EXTREME SELF CARE
….know that you are not alone.
In many ways the universe is inviting us to open up and let go of those things that are no longer serve our best interests; not always does this seem our choice at the time. People and situations may no longer match who we are vibrationally, or that of whom we are soon becoming.
Astrologers tell us that eclipses are a natural ‘housecleaning’ phenomenon that open a portal or space in the universe, so that we may ‘toss’ the old and by our willingness, positive belief and action, move into creating something brand new for ourselves.
For me, in the last few weeks, work hours disappeared, the power steering hoses in my car rusted out and needed to be replaced, my furry Angel Cat friend became unwell and a course I was anticipating needed to be cancelled, due to a personal crisis in the instructor’s life.
Throughout this challenging time, I was able to stay grounded and in the knowing that all would work itself out, in time. I stayed connected to my favorite touchstone saying, offered to me by my colleague friend, Sonia:
‘I have no idea how all of this will work out. My job is to follow my spirit and God ( Source, the Universe, insert your own word here ) is looking after the HOW~~~’
Also during this time, creative new ideas and opportunities I was able to incorporate into my work opened up for me; several relationships deepened, wonderful family connections happened, supportive new friends arrived and the miracle of ‘found money’ assisted me on my journey.
Transforming times like these remind me of one of my favourite pieces of prose, from my childhood:
HALFWAY DOWN
Halfway down the stairs
Is a stair
Where I sit.
There isn’t any
Other stair
Quite like
It.
I’m not at the bottom,
I’m not at the top;
So this is the stair
Where I always
Stop.
Halfway up the stairs
Isn’t up,
And isn’t down.
It isn’t in the nursery,
It isn’t in the town.
And all sort of funny thoughts
Run round my head:
“It isn’t really
Anywhere!
It’s somewhere else
Instead!”
A.A Milne
Today offers a very real opening in the ethers, to pause in the ‘ SOMEWHERE ELSE INSTEAD’, to walk out of the fear and shift to one’s perception to a positive outlook. It is also a powerful time to write out a New Moon Wish list, noting those things you choose to create. The key to manifesting is found in the intensity of feeling, the trueness of ones heart’s desire that sends the affirmation forward.
Whether through prayer, meditation, intention or dreaming this is a powerful time to send your new CREATIVE SOUL PRINT out to the universe, to be supported by all that is.
P.S. You may wish to check out your favourite astrologers for more info on where the Eclipse falls in your chart and this amazing opportunity to let go of old paradigms.
Cosmic Blessings to you all~
Linda
Letting God Out Of The Box…
So We Can Fly Free
SKYWALKER LUKE~!
I was confounded that adults would believe God only shared the whole truth with a particular group: theirs. And even more so, when I heard that this meant that all the others in the ‘wrong’ group, would most surely be going to the H e double l place, or at the very least to a ‘lesser degree of glory’…..whatever that meant?
Since I was blessed, intuitively guided to always be connected to the God source energy in my heart, in nature, in the love I felt for my sisters, and in many others who did not go to the current church of choice, this adult need to label and attend the ‘right’ church made no sense to me.
All my inward observing and questioning became the catalyst that challenged me to sort out my own spiritual beliefs. Opening to this questioning transferred to other societal systems in my life; an essential process of individuation that allows me to formulate, on an ongoing basis my own deepest truth, as I know it, for today.
One day, teaching a Health for Life class to adults, I was using the ‘Box Theory’ as a metaphor for limited choice living. Wanting to share this concept with the class, I drew a square shaped box on the board, extolling the virtues of remembering that no matter how ‘bad’ it looks in the moment, one always has a CHOICE.
This word was written boldly in the middle of the box. The point being, that choices may not be the great ones we long for, however making a choice, is a choice. And it always leads to somewhere new. Some how, one can always break out of boxed in situations. A very valuable life lesson to extol, I believed.
I had the class’s full attention and sensed that the lesson was going quite well, which as any teacher knows is a dream moment to treasure in education! Using the illustration on the board, to emphasize my concept, I heard a voice from the back of the room quietly say: “Linda, look at your middle finger”.
I stopped, looking down at my hand. I was holding the chalk in my right hand, between my thumb and my index finger, pointing to the center of the box with my middle finger for emphasis.
“Humm…”, I said. “I believe that body language is a great subliminal teacher. It looks as if I still have some unresolved issues around feeling boxed in! ”
We all burst into laughter.
I’m sure this was one lesson they will never forget and I like that Divine Humour was my teaching assistant that day, emphasizing the Spiritual Law of The Power of Choice.
How often do you remember to use your power of Choice ?
From what invisible box might you be ready to break free?
Thanks Luke for you unforgettable demo of stepping out to the box~! Love Aunt Linda
Summer Solstice 2009: To Know Thyself
Know Thyself, Saith The Oracle
Of Delphi
Today June 21, 2009, is the Summer Solstice, the longest day of the year; the largest amount of light, solar rays, available to us in the Northern hemisphere. Throughout the ages, people have celebrated this day in reverence, joy, anticipation, according to varied cultural traditions.
The symbolic essence of the Solstice invites one to look toward the play of inner light and darkness. It is said that at this time metaphysically, the veil between the worlds is thinner, more easily allowing the richness of self awareness and self discovery.
Facilitating a workshop yesterday on varied aspects of ‘Soul Talk’ a participant, who knows me well, said: “You are all about self awareness, aren’t you.”
I heard this comment in a new way and easily responded, and now enlarge on my truth, by expressing it thusly: “Yes, since it is my journey, my responsibility, my soul call to deeply know and love me, I am all about self awareness. It is vital to me to honour and get to know all parts of me, since I have been created divinely, as we all have been. This is my soul growth path, my spirit leading me back to my authentic, Higher Self. The more I know, the more I know I have yet to know. And then the more I have to let go… (however I digress~!)
I do know that I can only change myself and through this process my heart opens to more clearly connect to my Self, Source and Others and my life shifts, amazingly.
Solstice is a powerful time for seeding new awareness’s, intentions, paradigms: preparing for new growth and a new harvest, both within oneself, and in ones everyday life.
I offer prose today, from a mentor I have never met in person, who had a profound affect on my life years ago. Her name was Virginia Satir, a family therapist a forerunner in family therapy. I immediately resonated with her book PeopleMaking, and its wisdom helped me through a challenging dissolution and loss in my life.
MY DECLARATION OF SELF-ESTEEM
I AM MEIn all the world there is no one else exactly like me
There are persons who have some parts like me, but no one adds up
Exactly like me. Therefore, everything that comes out of me
Is authentically mine, because I alone choose it
I own everything about me: my body, including everything it does
My eyes, including the images of all they behold
I own my feelings: anger, joy, frustration, love, disappointment, excitement
My mouth and all the words that come out of it
Polite, sweet or rough, correct or incorrect and my voice, loud or soft
I own all my actions, whether they be to others or to myself
I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears
I own all my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes
Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me
By so doing, I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts
I can then make it possible for all of me to work in my best interests
I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me
And other aspects that I do not know
But as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously
And hopefully look for the solutions to the puzzles
And for ways to find out more about me
However I look and sound, whatever I say and do
And whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is me
This is authentic and represents where I am at that moment in time
When I review later how I looked and sounded, what I said and did
How I thought and felt, some parts may turn out to be unfitting
I can discard that which is unfitting,
Keep that which proves fitting and invent something new for that which I discarded
I can see, hear, feel, think, say and do
I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive
To make sense out of the world of people and things outside of me
I own me and therefore, I can engineer meI AM ME AND I AM OKAY
VIRGINIA SATIR c 1975
What a wonderful day to celebrate the beauty of who you are…
And all that you are becoming~
Solstice Blessings to you~
